autism, family, Morgan

Visiting IF-ville

“If you worry too much about what might be, and wonder too long about what might have been, you will ignore and completely miss what is.”  From the “Happiness” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.

In my early years of parenting Morgan, I remember visiting If-ville on several occasions.  Every time I saw another child on the autism spectrum making bigger strides, I would question our course.  I would question what might have been, if we’d had access to an earlier diagnosis, if we could have afforded more therapy, if we’d had more knowledge of the best practices,…  I found myself repeatedly mulling over missed opportunities and bygone possibilities.  It was a lot like riding on the roundabout with the Grissw0lds, 

It’s been quite a while since I visited IF-ville.  I found it to be an enormous waste of time.  It also created lots of unnecessary baggage that I don’t have the energy to lug around anymore.

Finally realizing our journey is, and should be, uniquely our own, has allowed me to genuinely celebrate the success of others, without feeling like I missed the mark.  It has freed me to celebrate and enjoy Morgan for the remarkable young woman she is.  I wouldn’t miss that for anything. Below Morgan is pictured with her nutcracker collection.  That’s my girl! 🙂

I do occasionally look to the future “what if’s”, and new possibilities we might want to visit, when the time is right for her.

Until Next Time,

Know The Hope!

Tammy

Advertisements
Standard
faith, family, Morgan, Uncategorized

A Letter to Morgan’s Maker

Dear Lord,

I say this with the deepest respect.  Well, you did it!  You put someone in my life who can absolutely bring out the worst in me and, when I choose it, the best in me.

Morgan is my joy, and she makes me nuts!  At HER worst, she reminds me of me without You, the me before I knew Your perfect love.  Her worries, anxieties, and “all about me” moments, brought on by her version of autism and OCD, break my heart for her.  In my brokenness, I now find myself more merciful to people, more forgiving of the things I don’t understand.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         quilt heart

Oh, and when Morgan is At Her Best;  When she knows she’s done a good job and says “I’m so proud of me!”, when her joy is bubbling over the top at the simplest things,…When she pauses to speak to You about a need, no matter where she is or what she’s doing.  THIS brings me back to that child like faith that KNOWS, no matter what life throws at me, You’ve got it.

morning-prayer

I’m just not sure I know how to say thank you for that,… for her.

Love,

Her Mom

P.S.  I appreciate Your sense of humor.  On that note, I have a few things I want to discuss with You, and her, when we finally all get to sit down together.

 

 

Standard
autism, faith, family, Morgan, Uncategorized

Come Passion!

I was searching for a word, or phrase, for what happens to us when we can’t face a trauma that has occurred.  Whether it’s an injury, or an event, like the tragic situations we’ve seen in the news recently, or a chronic life circumstance.   In my search, I found the words “numb” and “disconnected”.  They hit home.  Healthguide.org

It’s been a particularly tough week in the world, shouldered on a summer of some major personal changes.  Morgan and I are facing more than a few “last times” as she grows older.  We are prayerfully continuing our search for “what’s next” in this new season.

Yesterday, after the storms, Morgan said “I want to see more rainbows.”  I smiled and said, “Me too, Morgan.  Me too!”  She had put into words what I’d been feeling lately, or rather, NOT feeling.  When we are in the middle of that gray numbness, there may be a disconnection from pain, but there is also a disconnect from passion and joy.  A good reminder to mom that it’s time to plug in again, and do a little rainbow hunting.

Mailbox Flowers

I pointed to our mailbox, where we had planted a spring mix on another gray day.  A couple of weeks ago, they still looked like weeds.  Now they are showing off a few sweet hues of promise.   Sometimes it is so hard to find rainbows on dreary days.  But if we don’t give in to the gray, if we keep searching, rainbows are waiting in new places, to be seen and enjoyed.

Until Next Time,

Know The Hope!

Tammy Vice

Foot note: Click on the link to Healthguide.org for some tips to chase away the gray.

Standard
autism, family

The Ultimate Goal

Recently, our older daughter reached a big goal of hers.  She is now a BCBA (Board Certified Behavior Analyst).  We’re very proud of Allison for hanging in there and doing all that was required to get there.  She’s always been one to set goals for herself and reach them without any major detours.

Morgan’s path has been a very different one.  We’ve partnered with her, setting and resetting goals, taking two steps forward and one step back, often doing a few pirouettes.  We are equally proud of all she has accomplished along the way.

We made a sister visit to give Allison a medal for passing her exam.  Morgan gave herself a medal for being Morgan.  Both were very well deserved. 😉

Medal Medal1

Medal2

Ultimately our prayer is for both of our girls to know their purpose in this life, and experience the lasting joy that comes from being who they are individually called to be.  We feel pretty blessed that we were called to be their parents. 😉

Until Next Time,

Know The Hope!

Rudy and Tammy Vice

Standard
Uncategorized

“Good Things”

It started with Morgan’s weekend breakfast special; scrambled eggs, grits, biscuits, and turkey bacon. Her dad has recently taught her the art of turning that biscuit into a bacon and egg sandwich. Yum! it’s a Good Thing. 😉 After checking out the latest episode of Mickey Mouse Club, and relaxing a bit, it was time to head for SENSE Theatre. Morgan has been sharing some artwork with them, which will be displayed in March at their show, Circus delSe’. Another Good Thing!
Sense 1b
Next we were off to Project 22, for a little more art fun. I thought Morgan would be “all done” near the end of the session, but she surprised me by saying she wanted to “stay with friends”.
Hearing this made Mom’s day!

Later that evening we had dinner with her Mamaw, Papaw, and friends at the Long Hollow Jamboree. Then after church Sunday, Morgan capped off the weekend with a visit to the circus with a few of buddies.
Mamaw Morgan Long Hollow JAmboree Circus Morgan kenneth Lesa
This weekend was just one Good Thing after another, and the Best Thing was seeing her truly enjoy being with friends! Now I really think a nap would be a Good Thing. 😉

Hope you enjoy listening to our latest single, recently released to radio, available on iTunes.

Until Next Time,
Know The Hope!

Tammy Vice

Standard
Uncategorized

“A Snake on the Shelf”

“You will seek me and find me when you search for me with all you heart.”     Jeremiah 29:13

Ok, it’s happened to all of us at one time or another. We’re standing there, looking for that item on the shelf. We’re certain we’ve shoved everything around and it’s not there. Then someone else walks up, reaches in, and pulls it out of thin air. “If it had been a snake,…” 😉

When I get too caught up in all of the clutter on life’s shelf, I can easily lose sight of what I was originally searching for.  I can lose sight of what really matters.  That’s when I know I need to refocus and prioritize, preferably BEFORE the snake bites.  I need to choose quality over quantity, clearing out the things where the good has expired, making room to see every good thing more clearly.  I’m also going to leave an open spot on the shelf for fresh opportunities.

shelf

I want more than just getting by!  Now what was I looking for…?  Oh yes, the same thing I was searching for when I opened last month’s WordPress door.  JOY!   There it is!

Check out Just Getting By:

From the Project “More Than Just Getting By” Available on Cd Baby and iTunes

Until Next Time,

Know The Hope! (And the Joy) 😉

Tammy Vice

 

Standard
Uncategorized

“Good To The Last Drop!”

OK, call me frugal. I am a squeezer of toothpaste tubes, a scraper of peanut butter jars,…I hate to waste. But I’ve noticed other family members add items to the grocery list when they are still half full. 😉

Grocery List

Sometimes we approach life that way.  We can get so busy planning tomorrows, we waste the joy of the moments and the people that are right in front of us.  In helping Morgan deal with OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), I often find myself literally doing a song and dance to pull her out of whatever she’s obsessing on and into the present.  The plus side is that it’s teaching me to be fully present, to recognize when tomorrow’s busyness and worries are trying to steal my now.

Grocery list joy

Here’s to squeezing every last drop out of the day with the ones we love.  Right here, right now, even if it takes a little fancy footwork.

Until Next Time,
Know The Hope

Tammy Vice

Standard